28 February, 2008

Blogging in Tongues Yields Interesting Results

Daytona Beach, Fl - About a year ago Mark Heinburger got "inspired." After a number of his friends started using various free "blog" websites to post occasional thoughts, pictures and even video clips, Heinburger decided that he too needed to join the blogosphere. After searching through several different free blog sites he made a decision to join one. All that was left to do was to choose a theme for his blog and topic for his site.

"I went for a pretty basic theme" said Heinburger. "I didn't want anything too flashy. I've seen so many blogs out there with all kinds of flashy crazy colors and graphics, but that's not what I'm about. So I just wanted mine to be plain with just a few little pictures here in there."

All was going well for Heinburger until the time came for him to actually make his first post.

"I sat in front of a blank screen for several hours" stated Heinburger. "I just didn't know where to begin. As a Christian I wanted to say something important and useful but I've never been much of a writer."

As the time passed Heinburger started a number of different posts only to become frustrated, erase them and start over again. This situation went on for several days until finally, late one night Heinburger claims he received a "revelation."

"I just sat in front of the computer and suddenly the most amazing thing happened" said Heinburger. "I just started typing, just anything, just whatever came to my mind. It just kept coming and coming without stopping. I didn't know what was happening to me."

When it was over Heinburger realized that had typed a rather lengthy post, but with one major distinguishing factor; it was all in "tongues." He quickly posted his words and went to sleep. He awoke the next morning and received quite a surprise.

"I woke up and checked my email to see that I had almost 50 comments on my first post" he said. "I checked my stats and over 2000 people have visited my site in just the day. All of these people were visiting my site and posting their interpretations of what I had written in tongues."

An excerpt from one of Heinburger's post along with an interpretive comment reveals the following.

"skdit bhwosidth sdkh ! weiu ueif ywqplcxnf duwiel! dhsido? sdlkjq0gjn, sdld, tqnod, thewioghs wehros q wepop hfow!"

To which one commenter interpreted.

"The Cubs are NOT going to win the 08 World Series!"

Heinburger continues to make daily "prophetic posts," and his site continues to grow in popularity in the blogosphere.

"This is my spiritual gift" Heinburger went on to say. "I've never spoken in tongues, but I guess I'm called to blog in tongues."

TBNN learned that Heinburger has also been approached by several major book publishers about writing a book entirely in tongues.

18 comments:

Brian said...

I hope we don't debate cessationism vs. non-cessationism today. Just enjoy. TTNN you have done it again! Glad I did not have a mouth full of coffee when I read this post. I think both sides of the spiritual gifts can laugh at this one.

Unknown said...

Thanks Brian. I taking a break from debating for a while.

On the issue of speaking in tongues, as one who is currently studying the Russian language I can tell you that on many occasions I have wished I could just open my mouth and speak Russian!

-Tom

Richard said...

dfs sfhtikj uowerhh fhkjhdf! Jkjf hrpooi shuye psqr. J fkj rhhjfkjhdf id hhf woie mansd die mw r iahbtl.


Hkjhf ehkjh iem?

Unknown said...

Ha! Should have seen that one coming.

Alice C. said...

Richard's tongues interpreted:

"I'm really in the mood for some chocolate today. My favorite kinds are Reese's and M&M's. Anybody have some?"

See--it isn't always about deep theological issues!

Anonymous said...

Richard - so sorry I can't help you with the Reeses but we do have fudge stripe cookies if you want to c'mon over.

- Peace

Richard said...

Alice, Jeff, and Tom...


Thanks for the acknowledgement that tongues are true languages that can be interpreted, rather than some bogus, 'unknown' "heavenly prayer language".


Thanks for not also rushing to speak in tonuges in a large gaggle. I think two or three at most is the precedent.

Lastly, thanks for providing the interpreter. I think those are necessary to be Biblical, too.


Oh, one more thing...it was "Hersheys"....not "Reeses". Excellant translation, though.

Anonymous said...

This post sums up beautifully all the pitfalls of the blogosphere...

Darrin said...

This guy is way beyond my level. I'm still working on typing in fonts.

Jim Pemberton said...

I wonder if there are any deaf people who sign in tongues.

Richard said...

Can't be. Having a deaf person in a Charasmatic church casts doubt on the healing gifts also "present".

Not too much mention of deaf people healed by God these days (at least not like you see on TBN), so I'm guess they don't encourage them to come to their church.

Jerry Boyce said...

haha- I would kind of like to see whistling in tongues. Think about it.

Anonymous said...

"skdit bhwosidth sdkh ! weiu ueif ywqplcxnf duwiel! dhsido? sdlkjq0gjn, sdld, tqnod, thewioghs wehros q wepop hfow!"

The above word from the Lord proves that you cessationists are all wet! As a matter of fact just the other day my beagle put his paws on my desktop and typed the exact same prophetic utterance. This clearly supports that tongues are for today. It also supports the fact that dogs can receive salvation, too (but of cours cats can't be saved though...right?)

Eowyn's Heir said...

ok, I didn't actually laugh OUT LOUD until I read this one, "I wonder if there are any deaf people who sign in tongues." Praise the Lord for your wit, whoever you are! :)

Jim Pemberton said...

Thanks, Eowyn's Heir!

Actually in real life most people call my sense of humor "corny" - including my wife. It's nice to get a good line in once in a while. Perhaps typing a good joke is my version of "typing in tongues".

Unknown said...

Yeah Jim,

Signing in tongues could look quite interesting.

-Tom

Mark R said...

I enjoyed the blogging in tongues spoof. There are a half a billion Pentecostal/Charistmatic believers in the world today, the fastest growing segment of the Church of Jesus Christ, by far. It seems like the Holy Spirit is not paying too much attention to the theological debate over what gifts are for today.

I was an opportunity to be a eyewitness to a pretty phenomenal event in about 1969. A Corvallis (OR) Assembly of God, a 15-year old named Rex Fisher, was praying and for probably 30 minutes he signed declarations of worship and praise, which we being interpreted by an ordained minister who worked in the hearing-impaired community. To my knowledge, Rex never again signed after that experience. The last I heard Rex was in full-time ministry serving with Teen Challenge.
I know it probably sounds weird, but I was there. Do you think it's possible that God doesn't always fit into our nice theological boxes.

Jim Pemberton said...

Mark,
I would say that your experience is what true glossolalia is, where the tongue being spoken, or signed, is an actual language that the speaker has no prior knowledge of and people present actually understand. The satire here is based on the fact that many who claim glossolalia speak gibberish. If it has meaning to God, wonderful, but we are clearly admonished to seek the better gifts: those that edify the church. Gibberish doesn't do this and we suspect with good reason that most who speak gibberish in are merely putting on the appearance of being spiritual in an effort to justify their participation in a faulty ecclesiology. God understands this (which is chilling), and I would put my money on the fact that we have all been guilty of this is one respect or another. Therefore, this is a humor the serious side of which should have us question our own motives in appearing to be what we are not in the holy assembly.