They're delicious, nutritious and will free you and your loved one's from Purgatory! Go ahead and indulge yourself with all new Tetzel's Pretzels!
Tetzel's Pretzels are the most twisted pretzels on the market today. And at just $20 per bag, they're a real bargain. Plus with every bag you buy you'll not only get great flavor, but you'll also free a soul from Purgatory! That's right, every bag of Tetzel's Pretzels you buy comes with a "get out of purgatory free" card that can be used for any of your loved ones or saved until after you die to avoid years, if not centuries of purging.
So pick up a bag of Tetzel's Pretzels today. And remember When the flavor of a Tetzel Pretzel in the mouth sings, another soul from Purgatory springs!
About TBNN
Team Tominthebox News Network® is a satirical online blog written by Tom Slawson, V. Carlos Slawson Jr., Eric Carpenter and Bill Harris. All names of people or places mentioned in stories are fictional, except when a public figure is being satirized. Any other use of real names is accidental and coincidental. The content of this blog is Copyright 2008 by Team Tominthebox News Network. Transmission of and linking to articles ore materials found at this site is encouraged. ARTICLES, GRAPHICS OR AUDIO CLIPS MAY NOT BE ALTERED OR CHANGED, AND THIS SITE MUST BE REFERENCED VIA A LINK TO THIS SITE. The purpose of this blog is to make a point through the use of satire. Soli Deo Gloria!
For any questions you can email the Box.
For any questions you can email the Box.
16 April, 2008
Advertisement: Tetzel's Pretzels - Indulge Your Taste Buds!
Posted by
Team Tominthebox News Network
at
10:58 AM
Labels: Catholicism, Dr. Tom, Products
Stumble Upon DiggIt! del.icio.us
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
Commenting Rules
1. Please try to stay on topic. For example, if the story is a satire about televangelists, don't make a comment complaining about Calvinism.
2. Keep it clean. If you become crude, rude or abusive you'll be deleted and banned.
3. Any comments containing links to sites that contain profanity, pornography or blasphemy will be deleted.
4. You are free to put on the boxing gloves and step into the ring, however, if you do so YOU MUST HAVE A NAME. Anonymous bantering will be deleted.
2. Keep it clean. If you become crude, rude or abusive you'll be deleted and banned.
3. Any comments containing links to sites that contain profanity, pornography or blasphemy will be deleted.
4. You are free to put on the boxing gloves and step into the ring, however, if you do so YOU MUST HAVE A NAME. Anonymous bantering will be deleted.







8 comments:
Avaliable only through traveling salesmen, or can I get these amazing pretzels at supermarkets everywhere? Will the Pope be selling them at his events?
It was only a matter of time before someone came up with this rhyme.
They go well with Luther's Lozenges, cure for the common Calvinist- I mean cold. Whoops.
Jerry,
Come on now, please tell me we can agree that this guy was pretty rotten.
-Tom
Who is he?
HAHAHA just kidding- yet, he probably would love to have some, plus a little water to cool his tongue.
Short version-Tetzel was a seller of indulgences. It was his sales pitch and style that was the final prod to Luther to write & post his 95 theses.
I'm surprised you haven't done this before, I love the story.
hehehe... "indulge yourself"... hoohehehe... "twisted"... heeheehee... "Luther's lozenges"... hahahahah!!!.... How about Calvin's cookies?... hehehe... "water to cool his tongue"... heheh...ahhh
Thanks for a good chuckle today, guys!
hilarious
Post a Comment