17 March, 2008

"Bible Bow Tie" Not Getting Deserved Recognition

Spokane, Wa - The subject always seems to frustrate Pastor William Conner, especially in an election year.

"All we ever hear about is the 'Bible Belt, Bible Belt, Bible Belt'" said Conner. "Every television commentator talks about how the candidates did in the 'Bible Belt' but no one ever mentions us. It's as if we don't exist up here!"

The "we" to which Conner is referring is the little known area of the country some call the "Bible Bow Tie." The Bible Bow Tie is a small geographic area of Eastern Washington state and the Northern stem of Idaho which has a high concentration of evangelical conservative Christians. Few people seem to be aware of this area of the country as it is almost always eclipsed by the much larger area of the Southeast known as the "Bible Belt." But Conner is pushing to change this.

"We are a strong and growing region" Conner told TBNN. "Each year the number of evangelical Christians in the the Bible Bowtie grows by eight percent, and that's pretty significant. We also have had a strong influence over the years in the politics of our respective states pushing for more conservative agendas. I think it's time for the candidates to give us a little attention this year."

Conner has spent a considerable amount of time petitioning the major cable and broadcast news networks to run stories about the Bible Bowtie, hoping to draw attention to the region, but as of yet, none have responded to Conner's requests.

"We're not going to give up" said Conner. "Right now we're just a bow tie, but at our current rate of growth, that image could change. Already with some of the new areas that are developing we are poised to become the Bible Tank-top by 2016."


Richard said...

Hahaha. That's good.

Darrin said...

"has a high concentration of evangelical conservative Christians" - amazing how they manage that with a sparse population of residents.

There's also the Bible pencil on Long Island. Or maybe it's a thumbtack.

Stefan Ewing said...

Hmmm...extending this analogy, I guess the Fraser Valley area just east of Vancouver is the Bible Beanie.

Shep Shepherd said...

Bummer for that lower end of Florida.

Unknown said...

"Already with some of the new areas that are developing we are poised to become the Bible Tank-top by 2016."

Hmmm. Shouldn't that be "poised to become the Bible modest-blouse by 2016?"

Jerry Boyce said...

I heard the lower end of FL was going to be the Bible sock.